Monday, June 8, 2009

Got the power

Last week a girl came in who was already tearing up when she sat down. She would barely look at me as we filled out the intake form together, and about five minutes into it, she finally looked at me and said, "I don't want to do it."

Sometimes people come into our centers expecting abortion services. Sometimes boyfriends make appointments for their girlfriends to get abortions, without asking the girl first. This guy had made the appointment without asking, driven her to the clinic, and was waiting outside as we had our consultation. He had told her to get it done, and he fully expected her to comply.

It happens more than you think.

It happens more than I thought. One girl's boyfriend kicked her down the stairs when he heard she was pregnant -- if she hadn't miscarried he'd have taken her to the clinic straight away. Another woman came in with a black eye after having the same argument with her boyfriend. All too often abortion is touted as some sort of empowerment for women. I promise you it's not. It's just one more way for them to be abused by men.

This girl came in distraught, so alone, so confused. If her boyfriend had taken her to a different sort of place, she very easily could have been cajoled into giving up her baby. As it is, this story has a happy ending -- we talked about how *of course* she could keep her baby, how *of course* he had no right to ask this of her. She left with an appointment for a free sonogram and pre-natal care, and the smile of a woman joyfully anticipating her first child.

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