Monday, June 29, 2009

An Ounce of Prevention and a Pound of Cure

Every once in a while, we have to deal with some...unorthodox situations at the crisis pregnancy centers. For example, at our Bronx center run by the wonderful and talented Liz Alvarez, we had a frantic knock at the door about 10:00 in the morning. A mother was outside with two of her children, a daughter and a son. The daughter was just 12 years old.

Much to my relief (and surprise), she explained that she wanted us to speak to her daughter about abstinence. She herself had been a client at a pregnancy resource center about 18 years ago, during her first pregnancy. With tears in her eyes she thanked us - and all who work to help pregnant women - for the life of her brilliant son, who is now in a top college in Connecticut.

Her daughter, on the other hand, was less than thrilled. The trip this morning was punishment for a little joyride she took on Friday with her boyfriend; and while she claims nothing happened between the two of them, there was undoubtedly ample time...and temptation. We spoke to her about many things - from the deeper meaning of sex, to the beauty of abstinence, to respect between boyfriend and girlfriend and the consequences of pregnancy and STDs. After just half an hour of talking, the poor girl was crying on my shoulder.

She stayed for more than four hours altogether, watching resource videos and talking with the counselors.

Soon after she left, I took another client; one who had been seen only weeks before. She didn't have an appointment today, but when I asked her what she was here for she responded by glancing nervously at her boyfriend and muttering, "Abortion."

When I took her to the back room to do the intake, she leaned forward and - after checking the doorway for listeners - confided in me that she really didn't want an abortion after all. She explained that her housing situation was unstable, something she hadn't mentioned in her past visit. When I asked her why her boyfriend was with her, her mood instantly deflated.

"He's the other problem," she sighed. "He won't let me keep it."

Liz, who was walking by the room at the moment, popped her head in and exclaimed, "Then abort him instead!" We explained to her that no one can force her into an abortion, but offered to speak to the boyfriend to attempt to get him to take the pressure off her. Liz then showed both this young girl - and her apathetic boyfriend, who was already the father of several children by other women - a video of actual abortions in progress. By the end, the girl was in tears and the boyfriend was looking, if not downright disturbed, than at least a bit more uncomfortable than he was before.

He tried to convince us that abortion isn't really wrong...because the "thing" (meaning the tiny person) being "removed" (that is, killed) is so small.

We had a lengthy conversation with him on the topic. He left not fully convinced, but with some hefty food for thought.

His girlfriend is keeping her baby.

Such encounters make me wonder, though: would this beautiful young mother be in this situation if she had had a mother to drag her in here when she was 12? If someone had just taken the time to make sure she was educated on the consequences of sex, would her life be any different? It's too late to go back and change her life, but hopefully her courageous example will be an inspiration to others...maybe others who have not yet made such painful choices.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Stories of Struggle

I never cease to be surprised by the stories of tragedy and hardship that lead women to walk through the doors of an abortion clinic. It is truly a place of sadness and death on several different levels. When Julie waved Sarah over to fence outside the back of Dr. Emily’s so that they could talk, neither of us expected what she would say.

Sarah was only 16 years old and wanted an abortion for her 19-week-old baby. She also has Aids, which is the primary reason she is seeking this abortion. Sarah ran away from home when she was 12 and began working the streets. Her prostitution led her to contract the Aids virus. This is her first pregnancy and she is now scared that her unborn child will be born with the disease.

After talking with Julie for quite a while, she still decided to go into the clinic. Dr. Emily’s would not perform the abortion, but referred her elsewhere.

However, this story is not over. Sarah has not yet had the abortion, so hope still remains. Join us in praying for Sarah and her unborn child. I have come to see that miracles do happen.

Friday, June 26, 2009


We were watching Jeopardy tonight in the lifehouse. The show manages to be remarkably engaging, perhaps because of those high-tense moments when everyone watching knows the right answer, but the favored contestant just can’t seem to figure it out. Sometimes I feel like it’s that way with some of the women we council. Under the stress of their lives at the moment, the best choice is obscured, even while those of us in the outside think the answer is obvious.

Such was the case with one of the girls I counseled today, who I’ll call “Marissa.” She has such a store of wisdom within her, yet feels trapped in her current situation. She’s only known she’s been pregnant for a few days, and her immediate instinct was abortion. Recently unemployed, this normally independent woman was forced to turn to welfare. Caught up in the love for her two older children, she’s ready to deny her third. But once she stopped to think about it, once she learned the truth and, in her own words, “opened her mind” to the broader perspective, she recognized that this wasn’t a choice she could make instantly. It needed thought, and prayer. And then she admitted something I thought held so much wisdom: how late at night, even when lying next to her boyfriend, there was a thirst within her that she couldn’t fill. Now, trying to cope with an unplanned pregnancy, she sat in the chapel at the back of the clinic and began to fill that thirst. Somehow, this baby—itself a miracle, since she had thought she was infertile—was bringing its mother to trust and hope in God.

Despite this transformation, “Marissa” is still considering abortion, still struggling to look beyond her current situation. Please pray that this woman, strong and beautiful and wise, is able to hold on to true wisdom, and make the choice that is best for herself and her family.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

David Slays Goliath

On Tuesday, I had one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I was standing outside the front of Dr. Emily's, an abortion mill in the South Bronx, when a girl walked up. I immediately approached her and asked how many weeks she was. At the time, I was holding a box that contained actual models of an unborn baby's life cycle. When she saw the little babies, she immediately began to cry, exclaiming, "I'm a Christian, and I know this is wrong, but I have no choice!" She then rushed in.

I immediately began to ask the other interns who were at the mill with me to pray for her. Less than a minute later, a clinic worker came out and yelled at me, telling me that the girl who had just gone in was now bawling inside and that I needed to "leave her alone because she doesn't want to talk to me." I knew the real reason the woman was out here was because the crying was bad for the clinic's business.

11 o'clock came so I moved to the back of the mill where we could give post-abortion counseling to the women coming out after their procedures because there would be no more women coming in for abortions after that time. Well, to my surprise, the girl who had been crying earlier was standing outside on the phone. I immediately approached her and asked what happened because I knew it was too soon for her to have had her abortion.

She explained that her insurance had been denied. I then knew that God had answered my prayers. I remembered she was a Christian so I began talking to her about the Bible and how the book of Jeremiah says that before God formed her in the womb, He knew her, and before she were born, He set her apart for His holy purpose (Jeremiah 1:5). I explained this passage applied to her precious child inside her womb too. She explained to me she would love to keep the child, but she knew she couldn't. She was divorcing her husband, and she already had about half a dozen children, including a newborn. She simply couldn't deal with anymore.

I explained that life was a precious gift, and that deep down, she cared for ALL her children, including the one in her womb. She looked at me in the eyes, and replied, "You are right." She told me how she DID care for her unborn child. She explained that she felt that the baby was a boy. I explained that the Lord had plans for this child. I even suggested that she should name him Jeremiah because Jeremiah 29:11 says, "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" I told her how the Lord has a hopeful future for this boy. She then said, "No, his name is David, like David and Goliath." That was awesome because I then said, "David is fighting for his life right now! GOLIATH is this abortion clinic, and he's such a small boy! He NEEDS to defeat the Evil One, the Devil!"

I continued to talk to her for a little while longer. All the while, she was crying. At around 12 o'clock (I had been talking to her for about an hour), she stopped me from talking. With a big smile, she said, "Guess what? You got me."

I didn't know what she meant at first. She then said, "I'm keeping David." I was so overjoyed that I gave her a huge hug. I then called her my "bff" or "Best Friend Forever." Her spirit was immediately lifted and she became joyful. She wanted to meet all of my friends so I introduced her to them and we ended up talking for another half hour. Finally, toward the end of her conversation, she said to us, "Since I am going to keep this baby, I want you guys to make me a promise." We all said sure. She then said, "I want you guys all to be in the delivery room with me the day that David is born!" We all readily agreed! She then left to, in her own words, "stuff" her face with food and take a nap.

I called her later that night to see how she was doing and she answered her phone by saying, "Hey BFF!" She is such a joyful woman! She invited me over to her house sometime so that she can make me a huge dinner! I'm excited!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Chrystal Part 3: Birth of Emory Lee!

View blogs on March 11 and May 9 for beginning of this thrilling EMC story.

Chrystal was our greatest story of last year. This mama really knew how to fight for her baby, and Clare and I got to experience the reward of being pregnancy counselors at 5:33 am Monday morning, 6/22/09.

She gave birth to a beautiful little girl named Emory Lee!

She was 6 pounds and 5 ounces, 19 inches long. Clare, former intern, was in the birthing room with Chrystal and her husband in the Stamford hospital. I escaped to the waiting room because I'm squeamish and absolutely would have passed out.

One problem that may arise is methadone withdrawls for poor little Emory. Chrystal had been battling with drug addiction and had to take doses of methadone so she could function during the week. Little Emory might have become dependant on it as well when she was in the womb. The nurses thought that she was a little fidgety, but she was not crying as much as babies normally do when they are going through withdrawls. So there is hope that she might not have to go to the intensive care unit.

But Chrystal was so thrilled with her baby and her husband was as well. He couldn't believe that it all started at Dr. Emily's abortion clinic when he flipped me off when I told them they didnt have to do an abortion, and when Clare helped Chrystal sneak away from the clinic. He looked at little Emory and said he felt really bad that he wanted to abort her.

That was a long turnaround. It really goes to show that one day often isn't enough with these girls, they need constant follow up. When we turned her around at 9 weeks, her husband had tried to make her get an abortion at 24 weeks, which is the legal limit in New York.

It was pretty amazing that it was my last day for EMC as well. What an amazing way to wrap up my NYC baby-saving! Out of all the horrible death I have seen comes life! God bless Chrystal and God bless EMC!

White Castle Office

I counseled a young couple at White Castle last week (really cheap fast-food place for you non-Bronxers). No, we aren't that broke, but it's a convenient place to go if we snag someone off of the sidewalk in front of Dr. Emily's abortion clinic, the largest abortion clinic in the Bronx. It also has tasty sliders (greasy mini-burgers).

She was 17 and he was 19. He was actually her ex-boyfriend (which always makes for an awkward session). She wanted to do the abortion because he already had one kid with someone else and he can't even provide for that one. I told her the effects abortion has on women and how painful it can be-- for a lifetime-- not just one day. She listened and whithin 10 minutes changed her mind. Their situation wasn't all too hard, her older sisters had babies recently and she knew they would be excited for another. The boyfriend actually cried a little bit during the session, but other than that I couldn't get anything out of him. I hope he's had a chance to re-examine his life and is trying to be more responsible now.

I Yelled at a Girl

So these two young girls, 17 and 18, come into our Fordham and Jerome office. I was there by myself and filled out an intake form on the 17-year-old girl who was pregnant. Her situation wasn't particularly difficult, she was graduating in a week and didn't really have plans for college. But she really wanted an abortion. When I asked "Why?" she said "Because I want to party, you know? I'm young!"

So I yelled at her and said, "Hunny. Grow up!"

And then it got all awkward and quiet, but her friend was nodding her head in approval. I popped in the abortion procedures video and they were squirming throughout the whole thing. When it was almost finished, the 17-year-old girl said, "Hey Mister, I don't want to do that anymore." So I stopped the video and they started talking about raising the baby. She was all concerned about prenatal pills and what she should eat to make sure the baby was ok. Which was sweet but also a little wierd because just a minute before she was so casual about "killing it" (in her own words).

Bottom line I guess is that most of these girls are just too immature for pregnancy. So I've been making sure to get them to think about marriage and abstaining from sex until then. So many problems and so little time with these girls. It's great to be able to save a baby's life in the meantime though.

Monday, June 22, 2009

The first glimpse

It feels like a movie, honestly. Those scenes in which a woman's face is turned toward the screen and she's nearly literally glowing, beaming in amazement as she stares at the first image of her child, hears its heartbeat. They cry. They clutch the father's hand. Their jaws drop and they hold their breath as the abstract concept growing inside becomes a visible reality.

I spent today assisting one of our ultrasound technicians. I saw ultrasounds performed on women from as early as six weeks to as late as thirty-six weeks, an amazing spectrum of development. The sonogram is one of the best tools we have in this work, so simple yet so powerful -- a real-time viewing, an inside picture. At EMC we're lucky that we can so easily refer to and provide girls with free sonograms; I've seen many abortion-minded women change their mind after that moment, after that first glimpse. And that -- that feels better than a movie.

Grief After Abortion

We had a somewhat unusual occurrence in one of the centers the other day—a young couple came in already determined to have their baby. Only 18, they were newly engaged and in the process of finding an apartment to live in. Despite living in a time of such transition, they found hope in the baby that was theirs. Actually, they were so excited for the baby that they had come in a little too early—the sonogram technician could barely find the tiny child. Their joy and excitement, however, was mixed. A year earlier, the girl’s family had pressured her into the abortion of her first child. Even as she welcomed her new child, she couldn’t stop the frequent tears that came with the recollection of her first one.

After seeing a grief so deep, it was difficult to go back to the sidewalk counseling and see so many women making the same mistake. Abortion seems like such an easy solution to these women, perhaps because their situations are so grave. I talked to one woman whose baby was the result of an affair. She felt that having an abortion was the only way to hold her family together. Yet I wonder how hiding both an affair and an abortion can possibly heal her family, especially after seeing the pain of the other young woman. This abortion will not only destroy her baby, but very possibly the family she thinks she is protecting. Please pray that she will recognize the truth and find a solution that protects both the baby’s life and her family. Hopefully, such prayer can mean more young couples eagerly getting sonograms, and fewer desperate women entering abortion clinics.

Attending the 2009 National Right to Life Convention

This past week, I had the privilege to attend the 2009 National Right to Life Convention in Charlotte, North Carolina. While there, me and a few other interns were able to meet many young pro-lifers like ourselves and attend many different talks on different areas concerning abortion. I learned all about how to answer the tough questions women ask me on a day to day basis when they come into the pregnancy centers, along with the combative questions I have been asked by passersby while standing outside Dr. Emily's.

This convention not only taught me more knowledgeable information about abortion, but it also opened my eyes to the fact that people from all over the country are united to stop this terrible crime. A lot of times when we are working at the centers, we sometimes feel like we, pro-lifers, are so few in the world, but in reality, we are obviously not. At this convention, my motivation for the work was strengthened. I am so glad I attended!

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Courageous Love

A few weeks ago while I was working at Linda's I counseled a girl named *Maxine. As usual when I first saw her I was afraid she would have a hard time opening up. She seemed to be putting on the front most girls do when they come in- the front that they don't really care they are about to get an abortion. Maxine went in for an ultra-sound and I was proven wrong as usual.

The moment she saw her baby on the screen she broke into tears. I talked to her afterwards and it was clear there was no turning back now that she had seen her child and discovered her love for them. Maxine is just about to start highschool and an unplanned pregnancy will no doubt be difficult. However, how refreshing and inspiring it is to see someone who saw the truth plainly put in front of them and chose to accept it. How lovely it is that Maxine was able to see the humanity of her child in one instance and was brave enough to make the sacrifices not to betray the truth she found.

I keep in contact with Maxine and it always brings me so much joy to see how much she loves her unborn child and how brave she is in making sacrifices so that they may have the gift of life. Pray for her!


You never know how relationships can develop with those around you until God does his thing. Saturday morning I was standing on the side walk on the front side of Dr. Emily's Abortion Clinic saying, "morning" to whom ever walked by when I got to start a conversation with someone that happens to work in the suite next door to the clinic. I found out that she is more than willing to work with us from her office. This is just one more way we can help to peacefully bring down this abortion clinic. This lady actually helps run a mentorship program with teenagers mentoring elementary aged students. I also met a man who wanted help and knew that he needed to know english better.

Silent Graces

I am the unfortunate intern who recently contracted swine flu and is currently being quarantined in the Lifehouse attic (which I'm sure chris would like me to point out is finished). A part of me is really frustrated and a little angry that I am stuck in the house for a whole week while I could be out on the streets of New York doing my regular pro-life work. But I also know that even though I'm stuck in bed and I cant do any active pro-life work I can contribute to the work through dedicated prayer. It is easy to feel like your prayers do little to help the movement or save lives- but trust me- without the prayers of people we will never even get to see we know our active work would be fruitless. We see the effects of strangers prayers on lives every day and they are absolutely the foundation for all the work we do. Keep up the prayer!

Just the Facts

One day while counseling, a woman came in very nervous. She couldn't even mention the word abortion without crying. We talked about her situation and then I showed her the procedure video on how an abortion is done and some of the risks that come along with it.

She couldn't believe what she was seeing. She was told by Planned Parenthood that it was not a human being inside of her but just a blood clot at that point in time. When she learned that the baby was formed already after 10 weeks she was beginning to see abortion as "despicable". Then I showed her a pamphlet that showed the baby's little feet at 10 weeks of formation in the womb and she gasped.

She left the office with smile saying that she could never picture doing that to her baby. Just a few days ago she told me through a text message that she was going to have her baby.

Every Heart Can Change

It's interesting that the situations we get confronted with never cease to surprise us - many women sadly succumb to poor situations and think abortion a necessity, as if they don't have a choice, more positively though, every day we are able by the grace of God to help change the most hardened women's hearts. A few days ago, for instance, a girl who has had 14 abortions in this country and Nigeria was returning for a prenatal appointment because after a consultation she had decided to choose life on her 15th pregnancy - I even overheard the sonogram technician say she heard the doctor said it was basically a miracle she could sustain a pregnancy at all. The story gets more incredible though when this girl with multiple abortions was actually assisting in changing the heart of another woman in the sonogram room. She was really on fire - speaking about forgiveness and the gift of life reminiscent of that charismatic preaching in many southern churches. It was so very moving.

I learned that if we can change one heart, we are saving more than one life (the baby), or even two lives (the mother), we have the ability to create the most incredible pro-lifers around, save many lives, and even change the world.

Friday, June 19, 2009

The chapel's respite

In our center in the south Bronx, there is a backroom that has been converted into a chapel. Stained glass window hangings, wooden floors, a crucifix as the centerpiece. Though the exhaust sounds and noisy chattering of people below still seep in from the street, this room is moment of peace and refuge from the draining intensity of our work.

Today one of the saddest girls I have ever met came in, and after she left I returned once more to the chapel for a bit of solace. Afterward I was talking to one of our directors, who has been at this work for nearly ten years, asking her how she could continue, how she could bear the weight of sorrow and tears she sees every day.

She told me a story about when she just started, about how the work did start to pile up and she wondered why God had placed her here, in the south Bronx, in one of the worst neighborhoods in New York City. And then the realization came to her that it is *because* this neighborhood is so bad, so broken, so despondent, that God has placed her here. "If Jesus were alive today," she said, "He would walk these streets. He would minister to these people." Christ came to suffer with those who are so downcast they could not even lift their head, and in this work we see those same people.

The worst part is we cannot always help, we cannot always make things better. But what we can do, what we are called to do here and what every Christian is called for, is to walk with them as they suffer.

It's all we can do, and sometimes it doesn't feel like much, but at least when I walk back into the chapel I remember that we are not alone either.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Here on the frontlines of the Pro Life Movement you see all sorts of things. Sometimes you try to tell someone that their baby has a heartbeat, 10 little fingers, 10 little toes, and its own personality and the guy decides that he doesn't like that and wants to wants to beat you down if you say another word to him. At which time you know he's serious and so you stop talking.

Then there are other times where a little old lady (not that ladies ever get old) comes and gives you a hug for no apparent reason. Then there are others that think you have no right to be there because they think you're protesting in front of an abortion clinic that they work next to, only to realize that you work for that clinic that she thought was an abortion clinic, but really helps save lives instead of taking them. Out here on the frontlines, we get the good, the bad, and the ugly. Please continue to pray for us as this work can be very draining. The average Pregnacy Crisis Care Clinic Director lasts two years.

First Conversations

My first few days working in the EMC pregnancy centers have been interesting. Here I am, this white girl from Montana, still trying to figure out where everything is in the centers while offering a few words of wisdom to women who are sometimes twice my age. And we’re not talking about the weather, either, but instead having these starkly intimate conversations. Walking up to a stranger and asking her to spill her guts to me can be awkward, especially when she’s lost in a storm of fear or anger. But I’m slowly learning to find the kernel of strength and hope in such a woman, and help her to recognize its existence.

I wish you could meet all these women. Each one is so different, and each baby inside her womb has a different story. These stories have given me some of my most beautiful “firsts” this week. I saw my first ultrasound, and heard the heartbeat of a tiny 9 week old baby. And today, for the first time, I witnessed a turnaround, of a lovely girl who was so excited to tell her boyfriend he was going to be a father. She was so grateful for the individual care and attention paid to her. Instead of what she had expected, which was a “white slip of paper” and a cold doctor’s office, she received the kind of counseling that she really needed. Hearing her say this made me realize just how unique EMC is, and why the holistic work we do is so crucial. The conversations which at first seem so awkward become the key to saving these babies’ lives.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009


On Monday morning, I met Martha. She was 18, pregnant and dead set on having an abortion. Her exact words were, “I just want this thing taken out,” and she wanted it done as soon as possible. Martha was what we considered to be a tough case. She had set up walls a mile thick around her heart and the last thing she wanted to hear about was the life present inside her womb. She wasn’t interested in the procedures, the health risks, or the emotional side effects. The father of the child had been killed only a month before and she had no desire to bring a child into the world without a father. Two of our most experienced counselors sat down with her, and I sat in also hoping I could say something to crack her shell and comfort Martha in her grief.

As we showed Martha the different stages of fetal development, she stared in amazement asking, “Do they really have fingers?” We placed a model of a 12-week-old baby in the palm of her hand and she yelled and threw it across the table. She wouldn’t allow herself to consider even for a second the life of her innocent baby. It seemed that nothing we could say or do was going to pierce her heart. In my mind, I had accepted that she was not going to turnaround. After an entire counseling session she was still adamant about the abortion. I thought this was one of the sad cases you have to entrust to God after doing all you could do. I began to prepare to move on, but the other counselors were persistent. They didn’t give up. They kept talking to her and loving on her and eventually she cracked.

The walls she had built around her heart came tumbling down like the walls of Jericho in a waterfall of tears. Martha could no longer deny the life of her child or the pain in her heart. Martha decided she would keep and parent her child.
We learn lessons everyday in our centers, but I learned one of the most valuable lessons so far. We can never lose Hope. We cannot lose Hope in the heart of woman, the power of the Holy Spirit, or the grace of God. I had all but sent Martha on her way because I had lost Hope. How humbling it was to realize the power of Hope within our hearts! This is a lesson that I will carry with me throughout the rest of my life.

I was fortunate to be able to escort Martha to get her sonogram. On the bus ride there and back, as well as the time in the waiting room, I go to know Martha even better. I rejoiced as I listened to multiple telephone conversations as she called to inform her friends and family that she was going to keep the child. Martha said things such as:

“I’m keeping my baby because I want to. I might be crazy, but I’m keeping it!”
“I’m going to have my baby, and you are either in, or you’re out.”
“I’m having my baby. It has fingers! And fingernails!”

I watched as Martha saw her child for the very first time. She stared at the sonogram pictures all the way back home. We parted with plans to see a movie together later on in the week and the joy of knowing her baby would have a life.
A few hours later, I was back at the Life House when I got a call from Martha. She was sobbing as she told me she was at the hospital. She had miscarried shortly before. The child’s heart that was beating just a few hours earlier was not any longer. I talked to her and consoled her as best I could. She felt guilty because she had wanted to abort the child and now her child was gone. I assured her that she had nothing to feel guilty about and that she had chosen to give her child a life. She gave her child a chance.

Despite how heartbreaking Martha’s story is, it was truly a blessing that she was able to turnaround and come to appreciate the gift of her child before the miscarriage. She can now be comforted by the fact that she chose life and that her first child knows she chose life.

Foiled Escape Under a Hoodie

Here's another great Life story, straight from the bowels of the South Bronx.

Today, EMC Operation Frontline team members secured the safety of a baby by working closely with our South Bronx crisis center director Liz Alvarez. "Marisol" was first encountered at Dr. Emily's South Bronx abortion mill ten days ago seeking her seventh abortion, and was offered a free ultrasound on the way in for her scheduled abortion while accompanied by a friend (also pregnant). The abortion client was persuaded by her friend, who was keeping her baby, to visit our mobile clinic with her for free ultrasounds. After finding that she was 17 weeks along, her friend managed to convince her to leave without going through with the procedure.

With no phone number, this 17 week client had only her pro-life friend to work on her; but two days later she returned to the mill, this time without her friend. We learned that her family and the baby's father wanted her to keep the baby. She actually returned to the abortion mill for THEIR "abortion counseling." But she was unattended to for three hours, thankfully, in the mill's waiting room and she left in frustration. Julie Beyel, our Operation sidewalk counselor leader, who had first counseled her, tried again in vain to get through to her.

Then, a week later, Julie spied her sneakily exiting through what is normally only the front entrance, hiding under a hoodie. Julie approached her gently, called her by name, and offered her an immediate cab ride to our main South Bronx office, which she accepted. Liz and intern Brian Crenwelge spent three hours counseling her at our office at 344 E 149th Street. She left much happier than she came, and has been enrolled in quality prenatal care with a trusted doctor. She was also given information about a post-abortion healing program.

Clients like "Marisol" will take lots of contact, prayers, and sacrifice to keep on track. Please add your prayers to ours.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Divine Intervention

One day at the Brooklyn office, a young woman came in looking for the Women's Pavilion (a nearby abortion clinic). She had accidentally come up to the EMC Pregnancy Center on the 12th floor instead of the Women's Pavilion on the 6th floor. Brenda and I escorted her to one of the rooms in the office and began to discuss her situation.

She was pregnant and was no longer speaking to the father of the baby. She was looking around the room, nervous and confused. We told her to take a deep breath and that everything was going to be alright; that she had come to the right place for a reason and not just by mistake.

She absolutely did not want her mother to find out about her pregnancy, so we decided to introduce her to the Sisters of Life. We dialed the number to the Sisters' office and gave the phone to the scared young woman. After being consoled by the Sister she was speaking with she agreed to see the Sister in person. We had gotten the woman to consider having her baby. We exchanged numbers and sent her off smiling.

A few days ago I spoke with the woman on the phone when another intern and I were on a bus going from Virginia to New York. Coincidentally, she was on a bus going from New York to Virginia to discuss moving into a maternity home to have her baby. The young pregnant woman then told me something very beautiful. She told me something that indicated her advancement in understanding the reality of her situation and deeper knowledge of her faith. She told me, "This baby is God's child, I am just the vessel in which the child is being carried."

This brought tears to my eyes as I imagined the joy she must had been feeling at that moment. Telling me courageously on the phone that she was going to face her problem and do what she knew was the right thing to do even though it was going to be difficult. I will keep in touch with this woman and give an update on her inspiring story of bravery.

I only ask you to keep her and the EMC Pregnancy Centers in your prayers that the best possible outcome can come of this.


On Friday I counseled a woman in her early twenties who already had two small boys. At first I did not know what to make of her because she seemed nice but fairly distant and cold. I was afraid I would not be able to connect with her and get her through to her heart. I was wrong, I soon found she was a woman who possessed a beautiful selfless soul that I respected very much. She was raising her two young sons by herself, one of whom has autism. The father of her baby was not being supportive and she feared she would be unable to care for her two sons she loves so dearly if she had the baby. However, I could soon tell she was very upset underneath the surface.

She was nervous and seemed extremely uncomfortable, she kept saying she just wanted to get it over with. I realized she did not want the abortion but instead felt it was her only choice. She tried to pretend what she was about to do did not bother her but as I continued speaking to her she became increasingly emotionally and her eyes started filling with tears. I knew the abortion would break hes heart and leave a scar that would stay with her forever. I not only felt desperate for the life of the child but also the beautiful women who was sitting next to me.

As she sat there crying she said she could not talk any longer she just wanted to get it over with and she had no other choice. I could tell she was starting to crack so I got her to come in for a sonogram. She wanted me to call her the next day to check on her. Thanks be to God, when I called her back she told me she was confused and was rethinking everything. I prayed for her and told her to talk to Kathy about the sonogram. A little while later I talked to her again, she said she spoke with her mother and her mother had told her she wanted her to keep the child. She then said she thought she would keep the child.

Please pray for her and her family! She confirmed once again what I already knew, that women do not want abortions, the feel they have no other choice. Abortions break women's hearts and leave a lasting scar on their soul. What women need to keep their babies is hope. Please help to give them hope!

Helping a Girl Escape

Yesterday, I worked at the South Bronx center on E 149th St. Sometime during the afternoon, a girl and her boyfriend came in. I brought the girl back to discuss what her situation was and fill out the intake form. When I asked what her plans for her pregnancy were, she asked if I could close the door. She then explained that her boyfriend was forcing her to have an abortion against her will. She explained that she was completely against the act of abortion, but her boyfriend gave her no other choice. She also explained that she had been calling homeless shelters for over a week now so that she could get away from him because he was physically abusing her.

After hearing her situation, we immediately set to work. Her boyfriend was told that she would be some time with us, so it was advised that he come back in a half hour. After the guy had left, we immediately began making phone calls to find a home for the girl. We also told her to come back tomorrow so that we could set her up for a sonogram because it was too far in the day to get one at the moment. She said she would be able to. We then instructed her on how to sneak out of her house to go to a shelter when the time was right. With all her instructions given to her, she left for the day. I texted her later that night to make sure she was alright.

Today, she came back for her sonogram. She saw her baby and was so overjoyed. Her boyfriend still thought she was going to get an abortion sometime and that the sonogram was simply the first step in the process. She left today happy. She is still working out arrangements to find a place to live so please pray for "Rita" and for her safety against her boyfriend. She is keeping us updated on what is going on in her life.

Seeing is Believing

It has been said that a picture is worth a thousand words. Images have the power to change a mind...and thus, by extension, a life. When the lives are mothers seeking abortions, however, special pictures are required.

It may seem obvious, but sonograms are a powerful tool in helping a mother make an informed decision about her pregnancy. Ultrasound technology literally brings a mother face-to-face with her unborn child, and the reality that she is the carrier of a beautifully unique human being; a human being who often gives quite a display of personality during his or her short time on-screen.

Tuesdays at the Brooklyn office are generally happier days than most, as those are the days we generally reserve for prenatal care. The sonograms performed on those days are generally later-term babies who display calmness and contentment, reflecting the attitudes of their mothers.

Today, however, we had several young women come in for counseling, rather than prenatal care. One was a Ecuadorian girl of 16 who desperately wants to keep her baby, but fears the repercussions from her strict family. She is a typical "good girl," who strives to get good grades in high school - both to live up to her family's expectations and to fulfill her dreams of going on to college - but who, like many girls we see every day, had an "accident" involving too much time alone with a boy. The boy involved in this particular situation is eager to see the problem "dealt with," even if the price was the life of his unborn son.

Seeing her little boy - 19 weeks old, according to our measurements - on the sonogram screen for the first time was a life-changing experienced for this young mother. He was bouncing around on the screen, agitated by his mother's stress levels and giving us some beautiful shots of his face, mouth open and smiling. Whereas before the girl was overcome by fears of how she would tell her parents about her "condition," after seeing the face of her son her attitude shifted towards love of her child. She was still in tears at the thought of disappointing and angering her parents, but her child gives her courage.

She is not the only one to have been inspired by the images of her unborn child. Dozens of women turn around every week, awe-struck at the plainly identifiable hands, feet, faces, ears, and heartbeats of their little ones. The sonogram provides mothers with undeniable proof: the unborn fetus is not a lump of tissue, but a living, conscious human child.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Young Parents

In this work, we see expectant mothers and fathers of all ages. I had the peculiar opportunity to counsel the youngest expectant father I've ever met. He was a fourteen year old who said he had been sexually active for years already, and the girl was fifteen. Obviously, this is just one exclamation point on the fact that something is seriously wrong with our culture. Interestingly though, it is oftentimes the young mothers and fathers that possess the moral clarity to see how horrible and unspeakable abortion is, before being hardened by tough adult situations and deceived by the culture of death at large. These couples, like the one in which I talked, will be open and sensitive to the alternatives.

The good news was that they decided to keep their child after they got the facts and the compassion we offer, the bad news is obviously that kids, even before high school, are engaging in the most intimate of human behavior. If this couple is still together by the time of their senior prom, their child will be already past the terrible twos. Babies raising babies yes, but it is a joy that they chose life.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Saved in a New York Minute

Yesterday while handing out literature in Queens, a group of us decided walk down a few blocks past our usual spot. We stumbled upon an abortion clinic and decided to stop and hand out some literature outside the clinic. Not a minute later a young pregnant mother accompanied by her sister walked out of the clinic. One of our counselors immediately walked up to her to talk to her. The girl, we'll call Maria explained that she had gone in for an abortion but didn't have enough money. She was told on the phone that it would be 300 dollars but when she arrived they told her it would be 500. We began to talk to her and ask her if she would like to get a free sonogram. She came with us and we spoke to her about the risks she facing having an abortion especially since she had had an abortion only a year ago. She was speechless when she learned all that could have gone wrong and to learn the truth of abortion. She was horrified. Maria decided to keep her baby! Had we gotten to the clinic a minute later we wouldn't have met Maria and her sister. And Maria would have been off to another abortion clinic and her baby wouldn't have had a chance.

A Busy Day in the Bronx

I began my day at Dr. Emily's in the early morning. At around 11 o'clock, a girl and her boyfriend walked up to the front of the clinic. I immediately offered them a free ultrasound, knowing that if I could simply get them to go to the ultrasound van, I'd be able to talk more in depth to them about abortion. They agreed with caution, but that was all I wanted. When the girl went into the back room of the van to get her ultrasound, I was able to talk to the boyfriend. He was unaware that his unborn child even resembled a human being. He kept asking if his child (who was 7 weeks) had arms, legs, etc.

When his girlfriend came out, she was crying. She had heard her baby's heartbeat, and the thought of killing the baby now deeply confused her. The two decided not to have the abortion because they had to do a lot of thinking. I was able to give my number to the boyfriend so that he could get a hold of me in case he wanted to talk. As we were going he asked me how developed his baby was. I replied, "I bet your baby is sucking his thumb right now." He smiled at me, and right before he left, he said, "You really know what you are talking about, don't you?"

Later in the day, two girls, one being pregnant and the other simply a friend, came out of Dr. Emily's. Julie, one of the EMC staff, talked to them for several minutes before calling me over. She asked me if I could escort the two girls over to the Bronx center on E 149th. Agreeing, I led the girls to the nearest bus stop and rode the bus down with them to the center.

Once we were at the center, they received excellent counseling from Liz, the director of that particular center. It turned out that one of them was scheduled to come in on Monday to have an abortion at Dr. Emily's, but they had come in today to ask questions about the procedure. Not one single question of their's had been answered by the staff at Dr. Emily's. Each staff member at the abortion clinic claimed they could not answer any of their questions about what was going to be done to the woman during the abortion and that only the doctor could answer these questions. When the woman asked to talk to the doctor, the clinic workers apparently said that was not possible.

According to Dr. Emily's, the woman was 20 weeks pregnant. Well, when we reassessed her, we found out she was 27 weeks pregnant, which made procuring her an abortion illegal for her stage in the pregnancy. This meant that Dr. Emily's either lied to her about how far along she was so she could get an abortion, or simply didn't assess her correctly, or our assessment was wrong. Liz then told me that this woman deserved a real ultrasound because at Emily's they had not answered any of her questions. So I again took them to the bus stop, but after waiting for a bus for a long time without a bus, I located a cab and we road to Bronx Care, where we have a worker who does sonograms for us.

Finally, after a long day, I headed back to Liz's before heading back to the Lifehouse. Kathy, the ultrasound technician at Bronx Care, said she'd call Liz after the ultrasound to let her know how it went. Keep this woman in your prayers!

"Wait, so this isn't Planned Parenthood?"

It's pretty amazing how many clients come into the pregnancy centers thinking that we're a location of America's largest abortion provider Planned Parenthood. It's a coincidence that should probably more appropriately be called Providence. Oftentimes, a client that has already been to a Planned Parenthood will only realize we aren't associated with them after it becomes obvious to her that we actually care about her life (it's unfortunate how astonishing this is for some), and are willing to listen and spend time to offer compassion and hope.

Today two such women came in - one was 15 and the other was 24. After an education about the truth of the abortion procedure and unlocking the true fears that were confronting them, we were able to schedule both for sonograms in the near future. I'm not sure if their unborn children would have survived the weekend had they not stumbled across us instead of the deadly alternative. One of the women even showed me a referral slip from the Department of Health to go to Planned Parenthood. Hopefully, the fact she came to a center like ours that can provide prenatal care and emotional support will be the 'sign' that so many women look for and need in order to choose life. Of course, because of these women's circumstances abortion will always be a temptation, but we're here to combat that with the hope and encouragement women in crises need.

God knows they need our prayers too.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

What Really Matters

There are many obstacles to the pro-life movement. The more obvious ones - abortion mill workers screaming obscenities at us, laws passed by greedy politicians to promote the abortion industry, and the like - are actually relatively easy to deal with.

The real wet blanket in this work comes from the clients themselves.

Because of the overwhelming indoctrination of the youth in today's culture, girls today are lead to believe that sex - and its 'consequences' - are "no big deal." They often agree with us that life begins at conception, and that abortion therefore takes the life of a living person...but they simply don't care. They place themselves and their petty excuses ("I'm too young." "I'm not ready for a baby." "My situation isn't right." "I don't want a baby with this guy.") above the life of their own child, and they openly acknowledge that fact.

It's depressing, to say the least. Those of us who work day in and day out to try to help these girls are often powerless to save them from themselves. Additionally, the large clientele often swamps those of us working there, limiting the time we have with each woman...and, in turn, our effectiveness. We often close out a day mentally exhausted and emotionally drained.

Still, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. We do have girls who come in and are genuinely touched by our message. There was a beautiful young woman today who came in completely unsure of what to do, who felt abortion was her only option, and who was bound and determined to ward off all my efforts to pierce her barriers. Deep down inside, though, she was just frightened. The minute I told her there were other options, she began to cry...and didn't stop until she left, nearly half an hour later.

Already the victim of two abortions and caretaker of one surviving child, this wounded mother only wanted someone to reach out and offer her a gentle helping hand. We at the EMC Pregnancy Center were happy to be there for her, and all others like her...whether they appreciate and accept our efforts or not.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

First Fruits

After being here a little over a week I was beginning to get nervous as to whether or not I was able to make a difference. I was seeing the other interns getting turn-arounds (what we call a girl who originally was planning on getting an abortion but decided to have her baby) but I was not getting any.

Last Tuesday was a dark and rainy day. I began to pray harder than I was originally praying, saying the Rosary one after the other. Whenever a girl pulled up to the abortion clinic I would ask Jesus to send the Holy Spirit and to give me the words I need to say to convert the woman's heart.

A few women went in but I kept praying for confidence and strength to keep working. One woman started listening to me but then decided to go in. I told her as she was walking inside that we would be out here waiting if she needed us. She ended up coming back out because she had trouble inside with her insurance card and she took it as a sign. I escorted her to the van to get a sonogram and then she went back home.

Shortly after that, another woman pulled up in a cab. I asked Jesus to give me the words to say to convert her heart and then began to approach her. I told her that we provide free sonograms and that we could help her out. I could tell she was interested so I began to ask her questions. As it turned out, she was on her way inside to get an abortion but she did not know how far along she was or what the baby looked like inside her. The abortion clinic did not show her the sonogram or give her any information about the baby inside of her that she was about to terminate.

I escorted her to the van for a sonogram and consoled her because she was extremely nervous. After seeing her baby with the sonogram she decided she was going to keep it. She then thanked us for intervening for she almost made a decision that she would have regretted.

I thanked God for using me that day and this gave me the confidence I need to give this work my all.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

The Law Being on the Wrong Side

Last week, I was able to help out a young man whose girlfriend is pregnant. He wants to move to upstate New York and start a family. Unfortunately, he has gotten on the wrong side law on two different occasions when neither were his or had anything to do with him. I was able to write him a letter that he can give to the judge so that he gets less jail time if any. Please pray for him. I will be following up with him in the future. I gave him a number of different things to do. So we will see if the law continues to try to get in the way of this model citizens.

Saved by the Phone

I began my day sidewalk counseling at Dr. Emily's before heading over to the Bronx center on 149th St. We had a pretty busy day at the center, and I had the privilege to counsel several girls by myself. At one point, I was counseling this girl who was so set on taking the RU-486 pill. She was a practicing Christian and she explained how this world was falling to pieces. She stated how so many people were blind to the injustices of the world. All this time, she still wanted the abortion pill. Finally, Liz, the woman who runs the center, stepped in to help me talk to her. Liz began doing an amazing job, but the girl still seemed to not be wavering. Finally, Liz sighed, accepting that nothing we could say could change this woman's mind. Well, at that moment, the phone rang, and Liz picked it up. The caller on the other end stated that she had been to the center earlier that day and had watched one of the films showing the actual abortion procedures. At the time, she had walked out on the video. Thinking about it since then, she told Liz, she had realized she could not go through with an abortion. Liz was so happy she thanked the Lord out loud. The woman who was sitting in the room with us had heard the whole conversation. She seemed amazed to see a real turn-around happen right in front of her. We finished our conversation with her, and as she got up to leave she thanked us both. As she walked out, I had the feeling that that phone call had been God's way of "awakening" that woman.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Got the power

Last week a girl came in who was already tearing up when she sat down. She would barely look at me as we filled out the intake form together, and about five minutes into it, she finally looked at me and said, "I don't want to do it."

Sometimes people come into our centers expecting abortion services. Sometimes boyfriends make appointments for their girlfriends to get abortions, without asking the girl first. This guy had made the appointment without asking, driven her to the clinic, and was waiting outside as we had our consultation. He had told her to get it done, and he fully expected her to comply.

It happens more than you think.

It happens more than I thought. One girl's boyfriend kicked her down the stairs when he heard she was pregnant -- if she hadn't miscarried he'd have taken her to the clinic straight away. Another woman came in with a black eye after having the same argument with her boyfriend. All too often abortion is touted as some sort of empowerment for women. I promise you it's not. It's just one more way for them to be abused by men.

This girl came in distraught, so alone, so confused. If her boyfriend had taken her to a different sort of place, she very easily could have been cajoled into giving up her baby. As it is, this story has a happy ending -- we talked about how *of course* she could keep her baby, how *of course* he had no right to ask this of her. She left with an appointment for a free sonogram and pre-natal care, and the smile of a woman joyfully anticipating her first child.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

The New York Times features EMC!

Click the link below to see EMC interns and staff featured in a New York Times article concerning sidewalk counseling and the Clinic Access Bill.

Follow-Up: Rainy Day Miracle

I am happy to share the news that Renee has indeed decided to keep her baby! Praise the Lord! She did not go to her appointment at Doctor Emily's. Renee received a late night visit from the Sisters of Life and listened to what the Lord was laying upon her heart. The storm of prayers sent up to Heaven were heard and answered. Thank you to all those who joined in praying for this beautiful daughter of Christ and her child.

Renee's story is nothing short of miraculous. How wonderful, how beautiful are the ways the Lord works in our lives. I am blessed to have been able to witness and even share in this miracle. On this Trinity Sunday, let all glory be to the Father, and the Son and the Holy Spirit!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Too Many to Kill

It's depressing to be at Dr. Emily's abortion mill on any day, but Saturdays are legendary for their ability to sedate mothers into walking right past the sidewalk counselors without batting an eye.

I was out behind Dr. Emily's, becoming rather discouraged over the sad state of affairs (as of then, no one had really even spoken with me), when I had the opportunity to speak with a couple of young ladies who were heading through the gate. When I asked them why they were at the clinic, the younger woman snapped, "You know I'm here to take this baby out."

I was shocked at her flippancy, and surprised when her friend explained that she already had two little children at home. She firmly believed that she just couldn't handle a third.

Later that morning, as we were packing up to leave, both women came back out. The mother gave me a double thumbs up, a huge smile plastered on her face. After her attitude that morning, I thought she had gotten the abortion and was mocking me. I politely asked why she was so happy, and she responded, "If I had only one baby, he'd be dead; but God blessed me with two."

I was ecstatic. She couldn't come in to our pregnancy centers today, as she had to return to her two little ones at home, but she promised to call me soon to make an appointment.

God works in mysterious ways. This young mother believed the lies around her that three children was too many for her to take care of, and that the 'responsible' thing would be to kill her youngest child to 'take care of' this social problem. Instead of concurring with public opinion, God gave her more than she bargained for: a divine 'vote of confidence' in her abilities as a mother.

After all, God never gives us more than we can handle.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Rainy Day Miracle

Three weeks ago during my first day at our Brooklyn pregnancy center, I had the pleasure of meeting and counseling a beautiful young woman named Renee. She came in for a pregnancy test, which turned out to be positive. Renee was devastated. She is 19 years old, still in high school, living with her aunt and uncle, with no support or income to speak of. I and fellow intern, Beth, consoled her through her tears and tried to comfort her as much as possible. The reason Renee was so upset was because she thought abortion was her only choice and she already loved her child so much. She agreed to come in the following morning for a sonogram.

The next morning I watched Renee’s baby kicking and jumping inside her womb—a little boy! I also watched the smile and joy on her face as she insisted that it had to be a girl. Despite the excitement, Renee still felt as though abortion was the only option. We arranged for her to meet that afternoon with the Sisters of Life. A few days later I heard news that she had decided to keep her child and that the Sisters had made arrangements for her in Virginia. All I could do was rejoice and praise the Lord.

Renee and her child have been in my prayers since the very first day I met her. I was happy to know that she was safe and settled.

This morning I was at Doctor Emily’s in the Bronx. I was at the back entrance. Julie called me from the front to come fill in for her while she ran to use the bathroom. During the five minutes that Julie was gone, two girls walked in together and breezed by me. I thought it was Renee, but I couldn’t be sure. We called the Sisters of Life and left a message (because Friday is their day of prayer) wondering if this could possibly be Renee inside Doctor Emily’s. Sister Bridgette called us back shortly and we decided it was Renee inside. Sister Bridgette called Renee while she was inside. Renee answered but would not speak so Sister told her, “Renee, do not lose hope!”

An hour or so later, Renee came out the back of the clinic and I was waiting for her. She agreed to let me join her and a friend for lunch. I talked and pleaded and let the Holy Spirit guide the words I was speaking to her. Renee still felt that she could not care for a child and she feared that her child would have to face the same struggles that she did. She has so much love for her baby that the thought of placing her baby with adoptive parents was out of the question. We talked for a while and eventually she had to leave. We parted with a hug and a promise of prayers.

It was a MIRACLE that I had even seen Renee. I was only in the front for five minutes. Julie would not have recognized her. The Sisters would have never known she was there. Originally I was not even going to Doctor Emily’s, but was supposed to be at our Bronx center. The Sisters do not normally return phone calls on Fridays either. So many factors played into me being able to see and speak to Renee. If any one small thing had changed, we never would have known that Renee was inside. If Julie had called five minutes later, or if I had walked slower. It was only through the grace of God that our paths crossed once again.

As of now, Renee is scheduled for an abortion tomorrow morning and is planning on going through with the termination, but I think our Lord may have a little something to say about that. He has already worked one miracle and I trust that he will work another. Renee was not brought to me again for no reason. I have all hope and all faith that Renee will make the right decision. I believe that through the intercession of our Blessed Mother, God will save the life of a child and the heart of a mother. Please join me in praying for Renee and her baby boy.

Nothing is impossible for God!

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Atlantic City/The Murder of Tiller

This past weekend, our boss, Chris, took a few of us to Atlantic City for a short change in scenary. While there, his intention was to get to know us more personally, and help train us individually in regards to counselling the women.

It just so happened that on Sunday morning Chris recieved a call from a close friend who told him that George Tiller, the infamous late-term abortionist, had been murdered. We were all shocked, wondering who could have done such a thing.

Immediately, reporters began to call Chris's phone nonstop, asking for his opinion on the murder. By watching him answer all the reporters' questions, I learned how a person should compose him/herself when bombarded with questions that are meant to attack and how to answer some tough questions about abortion.

When Chris wasn't being interviewed, he was teaching us how to respond to certain types of questions about abortion (such as "Why don't pro-lifers hand out contraceptives?"), so that we could know how to respond to practically any question that might be asked. This was crucial because if one wants to be a true pro-lifer, he/she must know what they are talking about!

I learned a lot during my brief sojourn in Atlantic City, and it was great to get to be taught by Chris!

Monday, June 1, 2009

One baby is worth everything...

When I decided to do the internship this summer I knew I would have to learn to accept and let go of failure. I decided that I could do this as long as I remembered that if I was able to save just one life all my efforts and failures would be worth it. I'v been here a week and I have already met girls I was unable to save from abortion. Some of them I met briefly as they brushed me off on their way into doctors Emily's others I'v had long conversations with in one of the offices. They all managed to touch my heart and allow me to feel but a small portion of the pain and sadness I know they are experiencing. This part of the job is hard even though you know in some way God is using you to bring grace you cannot see into the situation.

However, there have been girls, numerous girls, I have seen turnaround and decide to give their babies life. I cannot say we have failed when I know there is at least one baby who will someday soon be born into this world, when I think of the joy that mother will feel when she holds her baby for the first time and knows all of her struggle to keep her baby was worth it all, when I think of the many people who will someday love this child and the many people the child will some day love themselves. It is more than enough of a reward for the work and I know there are even more babies left to be saved!