Training with the Sisters of Life

Last Saturday interns Heather, Greg and Manuel, went to a training conference with the Sisters of Life. The seminar that I enjoyed most was about understanding the heart of the woman in crisis pregnancy: what is going on in her mind and in her spirit after realizing she is pregnant. The different steps and the different feelings (fear, anger, upset, pressure) she has during each step.


It was very interesting for me to step info the mind of the woman. Often it takes much coaxing for our clients to let the walls down and tell us how she is really feeling. With this new training I will be able to identify with more certainly the different aspects of her situation. Thus bringing her to a place of hope, emotionally.



Manuel

EMC Has Great Dedicated Hardworkers, Who Will Stand for What Is Right, Even when Times Seem Most Diffucult!

Wow, what an amazing day at City Council with Robert Jackson. We walk in, pictures of Obama everywhere. A tense environment, as everyone is anxious about the questions that await us.

It is my turn to speak, and I get his full attention. His eyes are wide open with a broad smile. I tell him Why and How EmC helps so many women. I told him How I love to work at EMC and what I do as a counselor to help these young women.

He stares in surprise as we give him statistics of our parenting, adoption, and abortion rate. Ofcource adoption being our lowest percentile. Women feel if they can carry there child to full term, that they might as well keep there child.

I ask one of my girls to explain why she chose to keep her child. She breaks down in tears, as I comfort her. She says, "Its my baby". She is 5 months. He says, "so are you deciding to keep it"?

I look at him with shock, as if to say, "Are you serious"? She is almost halfway done with her pregnancy!
So, in concluding the meeting he thanked us for our stand and our truth on EMC.

I truly hope this bill doesn't pass, because then we will have a hard time reaching women from all over the boroughs.

How far will you go to defend what is right

Daily News article attempts to 'nail' our CPC

So in the Daily News there was a letter to the editor friday which accuses us of decieving women. Of course this woman who was actually pregnant and went to one of our centers lied to us and concocted false information to give us, but that is beside the point - we, according to her, are the decievers.

The glee with which this 'undercover' woman 'exposes' us literally oozes of the page. She even benefitted from our free services, now knowing the due date of the baby because of our free ultrasound, and tries to turn that into some insult against us (allthough I'm not sure, the article is pretty poorly written).

She clearly has no clue what women do or do not think about us - she just makes this up out of thin air. I'm starting to think that the only women that have ever made this big of a fuss about our services and 'deceptive practices' have been undercover reporters or NARAL activists out to get us.

Please comment on the article and tell the author what you think.

http://www.nydailynews.com/opinions/2010/11/05/2010-11-05_abortions_foes_resort_to_deception_what_i_found_when_i_went_to_a_crisis_pregnanc.html

Saturday with the Sisters

This saturday, I and a few other interns had the privilege of attending a workshop run by the Sisters of Life. It was designed to train their co-workers to understand how women feel during crisis pregnancies and how to communicate with them effectively.

Among the great training we had, a highlight was a seminar on how to be a better listener. In our work, being a good listener is probably the most important part of the job - so it was nice to learn about reflective listening and other communication skills.

It is always nice to be with the Sisters and network with fellow pro-lifers, but this workshop proved to be especially great.

Check out the Sisters at sistersoflife.org!

STD's at 17 years old

This is a sad case. This young girl came into our office last week, after to going to Planned Parenthood. She has been diagnosed with HSV2. SHe came into our office crying. She told me sh'e'd rather be pregnant at this point. I spent hours talking to her, as she poured her heart out to me.

She was in so much pain. The poor girl couldn't even sit straight. I told her, we all make mistakes as long as you learn from them. I cant possibly imagine how she feels or what she is going through. I just sat and held her as she cried, and told me some personal things.

To make a long story short, I kept in touch with her. I was there for her at 1am when she called me crying. I told her I think she should go to the hospital.. She did just that!

SHe found out, not only did she have HSV2, but she had PID and Gonorreah.. I felt so bad for her. SHe was thanking me so much that I gave her that advice to go to the emergency room.

Im so glad EMC can provide place for these young females to come and talk to us. I was so thankful to have helped her.

Free Abortion Alternatives: Under Attack

What you see is what you get. A very well known saying here in the United States of America. Our advertisements are clear on which services we provide. And anybody who's had English in school knows the meaning of the word 'Alternatives'. But right now they're trying to pass a bill that will make us put up a sign in front of our doors and waiting rooms that says that we do not provide abortions or referrals to abortionclinics and that we do not provide birthcontrol pills.

I heard a good comment on the bill. A girl said that's like asking furniture stores to put a sign in front of their store that says: we have bed bugs. It's not good for business and it's ridiculous.

A girl who wants to talk in a pregnancy centre about her pregnancy doesn't want to feel judged by a sign that says we do not do abortions. Remember, Planned Parenthood is the only one with a financial stake in this story. Every abortion is money for them. Which means that they are not entirely objective.

We need your support, and your prayers so we can continue helping these girls without them being scared away.

The chart came from this site

IT'S ABOUT LOVE

I was feeling really bad yesterday as i stood in front of Dr Emily's clinic because none of the girls i tried speaking to gave me even a look. I knew the reason i couldn't get their attention was because probably they could see through my eyes that i was scared. Seeing strong looking faces walk into the clinic made me really worried about saying the right thing and not upsetting these girls and their boyfriends. However i continued trying to get their attention until something else caught mine.

There were two ladies who came to pray in front of the clinic. Just as they arrived, they came towards me, greeted me heartily and went back to position themselves at the other end of the gate. After some minutes of prayer, one of the ladies stepped closer to the entrance of the clinic and called the attention of a guy who had come with his wife for an abortion and was outside smoking while the wife was in the clinic. He looked really rough and tough. But at the call of the lady, he came to the gate, where we were standing and listened attentively to what the lady had to say. I was amazed. Though he went back into the clinic to 'support'his wife who insisted on having the abortion, the message was already passed to him.

Then just after the man went back into the clinic, a couple walked out of it. As they approached us, this same lady called their attention and they stopped to listen. Again i was amazed. She spoke with them and discovered that she came out of the clinic still pregnant. A sonogram was done on her in our bus(The sonogram bus) and confirmed that she was thirty weeks gone, the reason she was sent out of the clinic. After the sonogram, the couple were adviced on what to do and they left happy.

When it was time for the ladies to go back home, i couldn't help but make my amazement known to the lady who had counselled the young couple and the man who came with his wife. I told her about how none of the girls who walked into the clinic paid attention to me. She looked at me with a sincere smile and said,"Don't be afraid to speak to them.It's not so much about what you may say right or wrong but about the love of God in your heart for them." At those words, i felt like bursting into the clinic and shouting to every one that cared to listen that i love them. What she said reminded me of a passage in the scripture that says perfect love drives out fear.

I am looking forward to going back to Dr Emily's clinic to counsel girls from having an abortion. It's not about politics. It's not about money. It's not about self righteousness. It's about love. Love is all that matters.

QUOTES

There are many ways we learn about life.They include learning from our experiences,from observation, asking questions and reading. Reading quotes of great people who are and have been before me is one of the ways i learn about life; especially morals. In this write- up,i'd like to share with you three quotes on abortion from great people whose lives have positively and unforgettably affected the world.

"America you are beautiful...and blessed...The ultimate test of your greatness is the way you treat every human being, but especially the weakest and most defenseless. If you want equal justice for all and true freedom and lasting peace, then America, defend life."
Pope John Paul II

"How great, therefore, the wickedness of human nature is! How many girls there are who prevent conception and will expel tender fetuses, although procreation is the work of God."
Martin Luther King Jr.

"If we accept that a mother can kill even her own child, how can we tell other people to not kill each other? Any country that accepts abortion is not teaching its people to love, but to use any violence to get what they want."
Mother Theresa

These people lived what they believed thus their works speak for them. EMC is living what she believes and the testimonies are always coming forth.

Abortion Stops a Beating Heart

We have all heard the saying "Abortion Stops a Beating Heart", but how many us have actually seen a sonogram of a fetal heart beat? Here is your chance! This is why we do what we do! Because the child in the womb, although pre-born, is ALIVE! This video was taken at EMC's Pregnancy Center in Brooklyn, NY.


Heather Nicole

Real pro-choice.

A few weeks ago, Lianne wrote about how being here had changed her. I can't say if it's true because I met her here in NYC, but I can say that I've changed too.

As a Catholic, I was 'pro-life' before coming to work for EMC. I think that it is a feeling every single person in the world has but, some times, we change our mind. This is exactly what happened to me during the last weeks: I was prolife because I was catholic; now, I'm prochoice, not because I believe in abortion, but because I really believe that there are alternatives, real choices before choosing abortion.

There are people that are doing a great job to give these women a real chance to choose, a real chance to be able to choose with freedom, with no pressure, thinking about her own body and her baby.

I choose life. I'm prochoice.


Manuel

She Chose LIFE

Today a woman walked in to the EMC's Brooklyn Pregnancy center. She was very pregnant, but she wasn't quite sure how far along she was. She had 5 children; 4 sons and a daughter. She had no help from the father. She was considering abortion. It would have been a dismemberment abortion; a two day procedure. It was a hard situation. Linda told her about all of the resources that were available to her. We could help her!

During her sonogram she discovered she was 21 weeks pregnant with a little girl. At 21 weeks the baby has all the organs present and many prematures babies survive when they are born at this age. She chose LIFE for her baby!

A Sucessful 40 Days

Sunday October 31st marked the last day of 2010's 40 Days for Life, fall campaigne! And what an eventful season it has been!! Here are a few of the highlights:

• Worldwide we saw a total of 604 babies saved due to the efforts and prayers of 40 Days Volunteers!

• Here in NYC our total of lives saved was 61! That's about 10% of the worldwide 40 Days total!

• We were very privileged to have a hand in reuniting a married couple and saving their unborn childs life.

• We began showing the Silent Scream in spanish (El Grito Silencioso)on a 37 inch, generator powered, Flat Screen TV! Right on the sidewalk of Abortion Row!

• Due to our longstanding and powerfully prayerful pressence, one of the two abortion clinics at our Abortion Row vigil site, MOVED!!!

But the greatest rewards of our work, we may never know. As often times happens, there may have been turnarounds that we never found out about, and that´s ok. Those rewards come in the heartbeat of a child and the love of a mother for her baby.

All it takes is lunch (sometimes)

A lonely girl came walking into the Queens office and checked the 'undecided' box on what she was planning to do with her pregnancy.

She was very soft spoken but honest. The father of the baby was a liar, but she had only realized after conception the level deceit in him. Apparently, she wasn't even provided with his real name even though they had been going out for weeks.

The counseling session was relaxed and easy - I just had to listen. When she got hungry during lunchtime we went together with another intern and it was obvious that she was touched by the simple gesture of sharing a meal in such a lonely time.

In a time when pregnancy centers are being attacked for "deceiving women," it is stories like these that show that most women love our services. In order to engender some sense of hope into them to help them first, and thus save the baby - we have to first be there for them. Which we do.

For Rent

All of us have been reading, watching and hearing news about the CPC Kill Bill. Most of it is bad news for life defenders. But today, we are talking about a victory. It is not a big victory, but in this war each single battle counts.

As we wrote before, there were twelve abortion clinics in Queens, in this area which is also known as “Abortion Row.” Now, there are “only” eleven. This little victory encourage us to keep fighting and doing our job: save babies.

Manuel

Decisions, Decisions!

A young girl came into our Brooklyn office yesterday. She is 22 years of age, and 23 weeks pregnant. She recently went to an abortion clinic on Monday. They said they would do the procedure for her. They told her that on Thursday, which is our tomorrow - they will put the seaweed sticks in her cervix. They said, it may take 3 days for her procedure, since she was so far along.

I told her I am so happy you came into our office. We gave her a sonogram and she was 23 weeks pregnant. The abortion clinic dared to tell her that "its nothing"..

Her boyfriend got shot 11 times this year. After counsiling her she decided not to go with the procedure. I am so thankful that she is gonna keep her child.

"HAD I KNOWN"

Not every girl that walks into our office shows remorse about getting pregnant when not yet married. While some may show it, they don´t admit it verbally; and i really don´t blame them. For those who are not remorseful, i strongly believe that they are a product of the society´s disrespect for the sanctity of sex and marriage. For those who may be but do not appear so, it may be a way of shielding their guilt wounded lives. For those who show it but don´t say it, it could be an issue of distrust or guilt. But for those who show it and say it, well, i really don´t know what to say; but here is a story about one of such.

She is a twenty year old from Ivory Coast whose parents were just able to work her immigration papers to the United States two years ago. Her parents are good christians, dedicated to God in their church choir and ushering group respectively. They came to the US some years back and left her in the trustworthy care of her grandmother who gave her sound moral and christian upbringing.

Upon arrival to the United states, her parents reiterated warnings against leading a carefree life and having boy friend in school. Because her parents had worked so hard to bring her to the states, she cherished their advice more and became active in church just to make sure she was far enough from temptation. But she got into college and that was it.

Because the college was quite a distance from the house, she had to live close to the school premises. She was tempted to have a boyfriend whom threatened to leave her because she was too religious and will not sleep with him. And the one time she attempted it, she got pregnant. Although the boy friend is not denying the responsibility of fathering the child, she is still in immense regret of her action. As she told me her story, she kept on repeating two words, shame and disappointment.

"My father will be so disappointed in me", " My mother will be so disappointed in me", "What will my mother´s friends say?", "I am so ashamed of myself", "How could i be so dump?", "Had i known!" These were some of the words she soliliquzied after telling me her story. The overwhelming feeling of regret and fear of how to tell her parents was so intense that i practically felt pain in my chest.

She will eventually break the news when she goes home on a visit this weekend and she knows that as she does that our prayers have long gone ahead of her.

The Pit

The biggest fear of a sidewalk counselor is seeing one of the girls that was turned around at the clinic back at the clinic at a later date. This is exactly what happened to me today.

Sometimes all the work it takes to bring the girl from the pit becomes moot when they fall right back in.

Luckily, this particular girl was able to be convinced a second time around to choose life. Last time she had been shown her baby via ultrasound and talked with for a while. But apparently, just as quickly as she had arisen from the pit, she had fallen back in. Interestingly, I had texted her last night to see how she was doing - she didn't reply but I think one reason she chose for today to have an abortion at Emily's is because she knew we would attempt to help her again.

This time we went to the White Castle across the street and we ate and talked with her and her friends for well more than an hour. (I was illegally parked for more than a half-hour of that time but didn't get a ticket - in this city you know that means God is with you).

She obviously needs prayers and constant support, and I will be more thoroughly keeping in touch and giving emotional assistance. Out of all the girls you talk to and see day after day, a few of them really stand out - for me, she is one such girl. This time I hope and pray she is out of the pit for good.

Choice???

When a woman is facing a crisis pregnancy, her mind is filled with so many worries and conflicting thoughts. Often times she is rather confused. If in her desperation she seeks out an abortion clinic, she will most likely NOT have an actual person sit down with her and explain the risks in depth. She will instead be given a list to read, of potential abortion complications, with the rest of her paperwork. This is done on purpose, the Clinic Staff are very aware of the emotional state that she is in. They are banking on the fact that she is too nervous to read through her paperwork. You see the Abortion Industry thrives on their clients knowing little to nothing about the procedures they undergo. True information makes for true choice. How ironic that an industry whose very slogan is "Choice", would seek to hide truth from it's clients.

One of the great things about EMC Crisis Pregnancy Centers, is that we really take the time to explain things to our clients. We explain abortion procedures, risks and complications, and even as you see in this video, two of our Sonogram Techs explain the way the sonogram works.


In recent news, Planned Parenthood, NARAL, and their friends on the New York City Council
have accused EMC of lying to our clients. The Abortion Industry is losing money by the day and it's because we are very successful at saving lives. Just imagine, if we have three women choose life for their babies after speaking with a sidewalk counselor and receiving a Free Sonogram (as happened this past Friday outside of Dr. Emily's), the Abortion clinic has lost at least $1,000. Now consider that we have been on the sidewalk in front of Dr. Emily's almost every single abortion day for over 3 years! Now take into account EMC's numerous CPC's throughout New York City, where six day a week we see women considering abortion. The Abortion Clinics are losing money, for them it is all about the money! For EMC it is never about the money! All of our services are FREE! They just can't figure out how we are winning hearts for life! All they can come up with is that we must be deceiving women! What they don't understand is that in order to save lives, we don't have to lie. We just tell our clients the truth and give them all the information.


Heather Nicole

Circumstances

One of my co-workers gave me a shirt today. It said something like ''A woman has a choice over her own body. Even in the womb''. That is so true. It made me think. Since most people think it´s ok to abort if the mother is too poor to support the baby, lets just imagine that an extremely poor girl wants an abortion. Two scenario's:

1. She has an abortion and continues with her life with Post Traumatic Abortion Disorder, mother of a dead baby just as poor and broke as before.

2. The mother decides to keep the baby, she gets prenatal and when baby is born, the mother gets help with the delivery, gets help after her birth with clothes and a place to stay. All with the (free) help of EMC.

An abortion doesn't change the circumstances. Often women think their situation is allready chaotic, and they can't have a baby because of that. They forget the oppertunities a child can bring. And that she isn't alone. A wise woman once told me: If girls would abort their babies every time a girl becomes pregnant poor and unplanned, the world would be empty.

The world is filled with lots of people. And population is increasing. Lets keep it that way.

With the Sisters

Working with EMC provides many opportunities to collaborate with other pro-life organizations with in the city. One of my favorites is the Sisters of Life.

Today it was a tremendous pleasure of mine to be able to pray outside of Dr. Emily’s with such a wonderful group of sisters. The impact of their prayer is of course immeasurable, but they are also well trained sidewalk counselors and, because of the amount of women they have all dressed in religious habits, they force the attention of the community and passers-by to the crisis of abortion from their mere presence.

Since us at EMC are there everyday they commit abortions, I was able to show the good sisters the ‘lay of the land’ – the direction the highest percentage of girls come from, the people I recognized as clinic staff, and also the residents who lived in the area.

It is always important to unite on the pro-life fronts, and especially during the 40 days for life, we need to get as many people together as we can to witness for life.

Change

I used to be very impatient before I came here to do the internship. Most of my co-workers can't imagine that, but it's true. Working with EMC has changed my character in a good way.

And I also learned how to stay focused on one thing in stead of doing multiple things at a time and not finishing one of them. I can counsel a girl without being distracted. I couldn't do that before.

Stamina is also something I have learned. Standing outside of Dr. Emily's abortion clinic for 7 hours a day trains your feet and your spiritual life. Once girls are inside all you can do is pray.

I read my bible more often. I am more confident. Working with EMC has made me a better person.

Lies (Part II)

This post is the second part of Lies (Part I)

I can not underestand how a girl can have an abortion just minutes after making the decision. With other elective surgeries the patient has to wait weeks sometimes, and undergo extensive counseling to make sure they are emotionally prepared for it. Even when a person goes to the dentist, if they are under age they have to go with their parents. Fortunately, this is not the case when it comes to abortion.

A girl came to our Queens office not too long ago she had obtained an abortion a few years back. The abortion clinic didn't tell her anything about the procedure and they didn't inform her about the risks and complications that she could face either. They sheilded her sonogram from her and of course it was a silent sonogram because they hid the heartbeat of her unborn child. We hear very similar stories almost daily.

The CPC Kill Bill wants to regulate EMC's ads and brochures, but we are doing nothing wrong. It is not manipulative or coercive to give a woman the alternatives to abortion, to give her all the information, to give her a choice. As if showing a woman an ultrasound, or a fetal development model is going to hurt a woman. You can not make a choice if you don't know your options. But, what about people and companies that make money from abortions? Last week, several local News Channels and newspapers like New York Times or Wall Street Journal wrote about this bill and how the bill was going to stop CPC's from telling lies to women.

National Review asks "What Misinformation?"
http://www.nationalreview.com/corner/249931/crisis-pregnancy-centers-new-york-city-what-misinformation-greg-pfundstein

I ask myself: Who is controlling who, and who is lying to who? This bill has been promoted by Planned Parenthood, the #1 "non-profit" abortion provider in this country. Who is regulating their ads? Who is regulating their brochures? Who is regulating their counseling techniques? Who is going to stop their lies?!

http://www.youtube.com/user/LiveActionFilms#p/c/D5405628AA510ADF/0/UIXHrusvMDw



Manuel

The Face of a Miracle

One of EMC's precious saved babies, this is the face of a miracle! What a beautiful face it is! He brings his mother so much joy! And to think he almost didn't make it. He and his mom stopped by our South Bronx Pregnancy Center for a visit this afternoon! His pressence brightened everyone's day. I wonder what great things he will accomplish in his lifetime.

Divine Intervention

When I think of Why I choose to work for EMC, days like today remind me why I love what I do.

Today was a rather slow day at the center. This one beautiful 21 year old walks into our centers which she happened to find us on Court Street. This is an amazing story, so get ready to be blown away.


I saw the pain this girl was going through, I really understood where she was coming from. She came in so cold, without a jacket. I took the jacket off my back and told her she can keep it. She was so thankful. Linda and I had tears coming down our faces.

Being her mom died this last June. I really related to her pain. Her mom was always Pro Life. The words of her mother touched my heart as well as Linda's. Her mother always said, "The moment you have sex is the time you are ready for a child, the child belongs in the womb and its Noone's choice to remove that child until delivery.

The young girl has a 5 year old son. Now, she is 8 weeks pregnant. Her mom passed away, and she feels all alone. She has a roommate that had an abortion 4 months ago. Her roommate is constantly pushing her towards abortion- even threatening her of getting kicked out.

I told her that her friend cannot stand to see her friend Pregnant. The reason why she wants her to have an abortion so badly is because it will make her friends' abortion feel validated. Her friend right now is going through Post abortive syndrome, and by her friends pregnancy its killing her emotionally- to see her as courageous as she is to keep this child.

The young lady is Italian, and the father does not want her to have another child. The baby is mixed with African American blood. I told her, the baby will be beautiful!

She is coming tomorrow with her "friend" so we can speak with them both, and try to find some counsel for the "friend" on her abortion past.



This story is to be continued...

RIPPLE EFFECT

Every decision we make for ourselves as individuals, no matter how personal it may seem like what kinds of clothes to wear or what to eat, affects not only us but others as well. One month now into this internship, I have seen how it´s-my-life attitude of young girls has led into premarital sex, resulting into unplanned pregnancy, and then the thought of abortion, which ultimately affects the unborn, the mother, and those who love them both.

For example, we have had situations where a girl´s reason for wanting abortion was because of the realization of the hurt her unplanned pregnancy will bring to her parent or parents, as the case may be. To her, having her baby at a tender age is a destruction of the hope and dreams her parents have for her. It is an addition of an extra load to the weight of responsibilities her parents are still managing carry.

But as she tries to undo the consequences of her initial decision, she does not understand that the abortion decision has even worse ripple effect.

For example, this decision will put the girl under a long list of life threathening post abortion risks like infertility, bleeding to death, or psychological unrest leading to hallucination or night mare. When any of the risks happens, guess who is also affected? Her loved ones, family and friends. The truth is, no matter how universally despised a person is, there is someone somewhere who still loves the person and will share his or her joy and pain.

The abortion decision will also affect the preborn who is to be kept from being born. Who knows what this child may become in the future if given a chance. This reminds me of a song done on behalf of aborted babies by an accapella group. Here´s the lyrics of the song titled, WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO BE.

What was I suppose to be?
What were my eyes suppose to see?
Why did I taste of death
Before I even drew a breath?
I laid my head on my mother´s breast to sing
oh Jesus, what was I suppose to be?
Was I to be a prophet used in the ministry
or a doctor who could find a cure to some terrible disease?
Even if I were born imperfect why couldn´t my parent see that
if I were made imperfect you came back for me
Oh Jesus, what was I suppose to be?

There are still numerous examples of how abortion decision has affected mothers, babies and those who love them both but~I will not be able to give all because of time. Nevertheless I will like to state the obvious that life is not all about just one person. We all are related, therefore we are all affected by our decisions.

For young girls who are contemplating abortion, I believe your present and future well being is more important to your loved ones than whatever it may cost to keep your flesh and blood. And for those who are not yet pregnant, abstenance is possible and is the BEST.