A Chance to Turn it All Around

Today it happened, I never imagined I would experience it this way. I was at Dr. Emily's clinic with one of my co-workers and this girl was coming out of the building with her boyfriend. My friend told me "It's your turn, I can't go now, otherwise the boyfriend will shout at me for being a guy". That was apparently the moment I have been waiting for, wasn't it? But when I started walking towards her I did the unexpected: I hesitated. I looked at her and thought to myself: "I cannot do this, she is talking on the phone it's not gonna work, why do I wanna try it if she is not gonna turn around?" And I did nothing. WRONG!

We can always do something, how dare I be so selfish? She had already gone inside the clinic so she was probably pretty sure about her decision to abort her kid, then how in the world did I ever think for a second that nothing was gonna change? Everything can change because EVERY PASSING MINUTE IS ANOTHER CHANCE TO TURN IT ALL AROUND, any single thing that I could have told her, even the most simple and obvious one could have had an effect on her to help her change her mind, but no it is too late, she is gone.

I am probably never going to see that woman again and although I felt horrible during that whole day because even if we know that we can't say that it is our fault when things do not go the way we want them to go (because that is normal, we are human and we are not perfect, any of us) ; deep inside I still regret my "doing nothing" decision because it left me with the doubt of what could have happened with that unborn baby if only I had been brave enough to make that step.

Little baby, wherever you are now: I'm sorry. I know that I can never cry your tears but I promise you that I will never ever be afraid again.