What is Love?

A beautiful couple came to our EMC center in Queens this week. The girl was very uptight and jittery. The guy was more relaxed than her, but still seemed anxious.

Both are in college.

She said many times, "I want to get the sonogram, to see if I am pregnant." She was dead set on getting an abortion if she was.

We were definitely going to give her a sonogram. However, we want to establish a relationship with our clients, in order to know how to best help them. First, we sat down simply talked.

The relationship between her and her boyfriend was "excellent". We discussed that for a while. She was getting very anxious about getting the sonogram, but I wanted to understand her better.

Based on her religion, she told me she knew it's wrong to have sex before you're married; but that her and her boyfriend were going to be more careful by using better protection. I asked her, "So you really like him?" She said, "Yes". I said, "Well don't you think it's better if the 2 of you wait till you're married to have sex again? This is based off what you told me you believed, your faith".

She got very defensive. She denied the question and said for the 4th or 5th time, "I just want to see if I'm pregnant".

After the sonogram, I sat both of them down to discuss their relationship with each other. I started discussing the effective tactics you can use to remain abstinent from sex until marriage.

The boyfriend was so reluctant to talk about the sexual relationship. Which, I don't blame him, but at the same time they came to me for help on behalf of an unwanted pregnancy. I was trying to help them not get in this predicament again.

He calmed down after I told him this and simply said, "We don't need advice on our relationship. We love each other, and are going to be better about using protection".

I gave them some of our literature after discussing other facts on abortion with them. He would role his eyes from time to time. They would laugh as well. They had this "I'm better than you" attitude. It's very common among the college students. And is the most dangerous attitude because they don't want to listen to advice. They acted as if they were so "knowledgeable". Why would they listen to a post college graduate, older than them, who's giving them abstinence advice because they just communicated they don't want a child?

She said her relationship with him is excellent and that they truly love each other. I ask myself, "Is love putting him in a situation where he has a responsibility the rest of his life he's not ready for right now? Or is love participating in an activity invented by God himself that allows us the power to procreate just for my sexual pleasure? What is love?"